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Breaking News - Bruce Jenner Transition Fires New Speculation


Wash. DC - Over the past year a rash of news stories surfaced speculating whether gold-medal winning Olympic decathlete Bruce Jenner was undergoing a gender transition from male to female. Though Jenner has yet to publicly confirm the story, members of his extended family, including the Kardashian clan, have recently approached various news outlets confirming Jenner's intentions.

Now it appears a number of world leaders have picked up on the story and are wondering aloud "What will happen to Jenner's balls if he completes the transition?" Sources this week quoted Israeli Prime Minister Bibi Netanyahu as suggesting it would be a monumental step if Jenner were to donate his balls to U.S. President Barack Obama. Netanyahu stated "Everyone knows Obama has no balls and it would be damn nice if he suddenly had Olympic sized balls. It would be a huge step forward for world peace.”

German Chancellor Angela Merkel remarked " I don't even have any balls, but everyone tells me I have a bigger set than Obama. I think it would be a great idea.”

On the other hand, Russian President Vladimir Putin joined Syrian President Bashar Assad in proclaiming that Obama's lack of balls has finally enabled a number of regimes worldwide a fair chance to consolidate their power. Putin, on a shirtless fly fishing expedition in Kanchatka, said "The days of U.S. Presidents with big balls like Reagan are over. Now it's our turn.“

Iranian President Hassan Rouhani remarked earlier in the week that "It's been great the last six years. It's like playing soccer against the U.S. with no goalie in their net ”

While world leaders debate the issue, closer to home New England Patriots coach Bill Belichick and Super Bowl MVP quarterback Tom Brady stepped forward to say they would each donate one ball to the President if Jenner does not come through. Belichick, however, cautioned that "The President would have to understand, our balls would be underinflated, but still probably an improvement over what he seems to be working with."

Can the GOP deliver a candidate with plenty of sack for the second time in 2016? We are going to need a real stallion again, a candidate that we can all call the man. We need a guy that will stand tall and look you in the eye. It might also help if this guy is secretly planning on chopping off your nuts and marrying your wife in this life or the next life. This would add to the manliness.

I know the election is still over a year and a half away but if we don’t decide right now who we are all going to vote for we may be too late and a woman might beat us to the punch.

So this new candidate must also secretly believe that he will become a god in the next life. He must be committed to not only marrying your wife but countless other women and produce countless children, this would prove that he has the sack to get the job as president done. What we need is a candidate with a god complex. That way everyone will respect us completely.

Another important thing to consider in a candidate is the gun control issue. We don’t want some sackless president that is unwilling to sign gun bills that obviously need to be signed. Now everyone makes mistakes so we don’t want to be too hard on any new candidate in this area. For instance, if the new stallion candidate happens to sign a bill limiting someone’s gun ownership freedoms. This would be a minor technicality and should obviously be forgiven. Lol.

Bluetickhounddog wrote:Can the GOP deliver a candidate with plenty of sack for the second time in 2016? We are going to need a real stallion again, a candidate that we can all call the man. We need a guy that will stand tall and look you in the eye. It might also help if this guy is secretly planning on chopping off your nuts and marrying your wife in this life or the next life. This would add to the manliness.

I know the election is still over a year and a half away but if we don’t decide right now who we are all going to vote for we may be too late and a woman might beat us to the punch.

So this new candidate must also secretly believe that he will become a god in the next life. He must be committed to not only marrying your wife but countless other women and produce countless children, this would prove that he has the sack to get the job as president done. What we need is a candidate with a god complex. That way everyone will respect us completely.

Another important thing to consider in a candidate is the gun control issue. We don’t want some sackless president that is unwilling to sign gun bills that obviously need to be signed. Now everyone makes mistakes so we don’t want to be too hard on any new candidate in this area. For instance, if the new stallion candidate happens to sign a bill limiting someone’s gun ownership freedoms. This would be a minor technicality and should obviously be forgiven. Lol.

do you even read the b.s. you write before you hit the submit button????

HA HA HA!!!!!!! WTF are you taking??? You have to be on something to come up with this BS! Did you forget?? Most here are Republicans and not Democrat's like you are describing!

Varminator wrote:HA HA HA!!!!!!! WTF are you taking??? You have to be on something to come up with this BS! Did you forget?? Most here are Republicans and not Democrat's like you are describing!

O hey vermworm, thanks for having the sack to step up to the plate. This is the joke section so I was only joking but if you must know here is the links to back up my joking claims. It is all fact. Haha

Be sure to click on both links inside this one.

https://answers.yahoo.com/question/inde ... 222AAFIhlf

This is the link for mitt the Mormons gun ban details.

http://www.politifact.com/truth-o-meter ... -rhetoric/

In 2004, in the middle of his single four-year term as governor, Romney signed a permanent ban on assault weapons -- reportedly the first such state law in the country. "These guns are not made for recreation or self-defense," the Globe quoted Romney as saying. "They are instruments of destruction with the sole purpose of hunting down and killing people."

A link to the nuts and bolt of mitt the Mormons religion.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QM0toaRF1BQ

DNA proof.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BXixnozLsU8

There is two sides to every story.

Just something else to think about, You decide.

Now you just need the sack to click on all my links, read them, then tell us all what you think. haha

NOPE!!!! Not reading your "Links" , Don't read liberal BS!!! Or anything that would attract you! I"m sure in your mind (which I feel, was Damaged when you were dropped on your head) this is something of interest, so that is good enuff for me to pass on them! TMO!!!!

Varminator wrote:NOPE!!!! Not reading your "Links" , Don't read liberal BS!!! Or anything that would attract you! I"m sure in your mind (which I feel, was Damaged when you were dropped on your head) this is something of interest, so that is good enuff for me to pass on them! TMO!!!!

ditto. this idiot assumes who we would vote for???