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man is waiting for his wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and
>>> informs the dad that his son was born without torso, arms or legs.
>>>
>>> The son is just a head! But the dad loves his son and raises him as
>>>
>>> well as he can, with love and compassion.

>>> After 18 years, the son is now old enough for his first drink. Dad
>>>
>>> takes him to the bar, tearfully tells the son he is proud of him and
>>>
>>> orders up the biggest, strongest drink for his boy. With all the bar
>>>
>>> patrons looking on curiously and the bartender shaking his head in
>>>
>>> disbelief, the boy takes his firs t sip of alcohol.

>>> Swoooosh! Plop!! A torso pops out! The bar is dead silent; then
>>>
>>> bursts into whoops of joy. The father, shocked, begs his son to
>>>
>>> drink again. The patrons chant "Take another drink!"

>>> The bartender continues to shake his head in dismay. Swoooosh!
>>>
>>> Plip! Plop!! Two arms pop out.
>>> The bar goes wild. The father, crying and wailing, begs his son to
>>>
>>> drink again. The patrons chant, "Take another drink! Take another
>>>
>>> drink!!" The bartender ignores the whole affair and goes back to
>>>
>>> polishing glasses, shaking his head, clearly unimpressed by the
>>>
>>> amazing scenes.

>>> By now the boy is getting tipsy, but with his new hands he reaches
>>>
>>> down, grabs his drink and guzzles the last of it. Plop! Plip!! Two
>>>
>>> legs pop out. The bar is in chaos.


>>> The father falls to his knees and tearfully thanks God. The boy
>>>
>>> stands up on his new legs and stumbles to the left then staggers to
>>>
>>> the right through the front door, into the street, where a truck
>>>
>>> runs over him and kills him instantly The bar falls silent.
>>> The father moans in grief. The bartender sighs and says,
>>>
>>> ;
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> (Wait for it)
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> (It's coming)
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>> ;
>>> (Ya ready?)
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> (Don't hate me)
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> (Ya gonna hate me)
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>> >
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> (Take a deep breath)
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> *
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> "He should've quit while he was a head!"

I like this joke, heard 100 years ago and couldn't remember the middle part...but everytime someone would say 'shoulda quit when I was ahead' I thought of it, and tried to remember the middle!

Thanks!!

I cannot hear 'alert' without thinking, 'well, that's good the world needs more lerts'