old woman on trial

[Big N' Blue]

The Night of April 1st

Defence Attorney: Will you please state your age?

Little Old Lady: I am 71 years old.

Defence Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened
the night of April 1st?

Little Old Lady: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front
porch on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on
the porch and sat down beside me.

Defence Attorney: Did you know him?

Little Old Lady: No, but he sure was friendly.

Defence Attorney: What happened after he sat down?

Little Old Lady: He started to rub my thigh.

Defence Attorney: Did you stop him?

Little Old Lady: No, I didn't stop him.

Defence Attorney: Why not?

Little Old Lady: It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert
died some 30 years ago.

Defence Attorney: What happened next?

Little Old Lady: He began to rub my breasts.

Defence Attorney: Did you stop him then?

Little Old Lady: No, I did not stop him.

Defence Attorney: Why not?

Little Old Lady: His rubbing made me feel all alive and excited. I
haven't felt that good in years!

Defence Attorney: What happened next?

Little Old Lady: Well, by then, I was feeling so 'spicy' that I just
laid down and told him 'Take me, young man. Take me now!'

Defence Attorney: Did he take you?

Little Old Lady: Hell, no! He just yelled, 'April Fool!' and ran off....
And that's when I shot him, the little bastard!!