A few short jokes

[Balsam]

And God promised men
that good and obedient wives would be
found in all corners of the world.

Then he made the earth round.
And laughed and laughed and laughed……...



A Mormon was seated next to an Irishman on a flight to New York . After the plane was airborne, drink orders were taken. The Irishman asked for whiskey, which was promptly brought and placed before him. The flight attendant then asked the Mormon if he would like a drink. He replied in disgust, "I'd rather be savagely raped by a dozen whores than let liquor touch my lips." The Irishman then handed his drink back to the attendant and said, "Me too, I didn't know we had a choice.”



Man goes into a cocktail lounge and approaches Maxine sitting by herself
Man: 'May I buy you a cocktail?'
Maxine: 'No thank you, alcohol is bad for my legs.'
Man: 'Sorry to hear that. Do they swell?'
Maxine: 'No, they spread .'